I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Duck Duck Cougar?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
