me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
