Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
