Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
