Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I licked your asshole in confidence.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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