The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize