you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
