Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize