do herpes really smell.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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