Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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