i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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