As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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