Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
