We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
