i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
