Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize