I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
