My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
