Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
