Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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