Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize