They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize