Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
