Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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