im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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