we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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