He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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