god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
