There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
