how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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