Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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