That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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