Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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