How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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