At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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