he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
