never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
