There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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