Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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