he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
