he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Randomize
