What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
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