great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
