They should really pass out barf bags in church
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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