Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
well you can't waste a boner
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
