youre lurking in front of me
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
