Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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