everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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