i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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