she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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