Where did you get a picture of my penis
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
