I wish i was in the wii world.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
